I don’t know why I’m depressed today. We are all healthy. We have food in our refrigerator, a roof over our heads, and the sun is shining. Sure, dh doesn’t have a job yet and we don’t have the money to pay our rent…which is due in 8 days…and I’m fat and my hair is driving me crazy…but none of that is bothering me right now. So what is?
I guess I just don’t understand people who flake out and don’t have the consideration to tell you about it. I had planned to work on music with Angell and Savanna…then about an hour ago my bro called to say they weren’t coming because they had other things to do. It just depressed me so much for some reason…I was looking forward to working on music, and talking another woman for goodness sake. My sis has been working so much lately that I never see her…and she’s too beat to do anything much but sleep when she isn’t working.
I just…need to make some IRL friends I guess. I feel like Anne of Green Gables-I just want a KINDRED SPIRIT. I will put in my order with God, because he said he would provide beyond all that I ask or think. So here goes:
Dear Lord,
I would like you to bring a friend into my life. Not just any friend, but a best friend. Someone who doesn’t already have 50 best friends that I will have to take turns with. Someone with a child, too, so she can understand if I need to get off the phone or if I can’t do a playdate on Friday afternoons at 3. I have had several friends that come close to a ‘kindred spirit’ but none that really fit the bill all the way. So while I’m asking God, I want someone who makes me laugh. A LOT. And someone who loves to get pedicures, and doesn’t like to shop unless she has money. Someone who will let me vent to her and who will include me in her life and family almost like I am part of it. Someone who will yell at my husband if he’s being mean to me…someone who will support me when I’m down about everyone telling me to let my child scream his head off, it won’t hurt him after all. Someone who isn’t mainstream and likes that I’m not mainstream either. Someone who will watch artsy fartsy movies with me. Someone who will donate an organ if I need it. Someone who will be there whether I live 10 minutes or 10 hours away…just a phone call away. Someone who will tell it like it is…but nicely so my feelings won’t get hurt.
Okay, I guess that’s about all I could possibly ask for. I wonder if I’ll ever get it?
Off to enjoy my pity party…later.
