Weaning/Nightweaning
The time has come to wean D. Now, I’m not doing this because I “want my boobs back” or anything like that. I had planned to let him tell me when he was through. If you’re surprised by that, you don’t know me very well! But…2 factors have changed my mind. The first and most important factor is that I have a lot of weight to lose, and adult onset diabetes runs in my family. Having seen what diabetes has done to my father in law, I definitely don’t want to get this disease just because I like to eat the wrong kinds of food. So, I have to get some serious weight off. I’ve wanted to do this for the last year and a half, but refused to wean D to do so. Yes, I could go on Weight Watchers and lose a pound a week. But I have over 100 pounds to lose and I need to do something a little bit more drastic. That isn’t healthy when I’m nursing a child. Reason #1.
Reason #2 is that D is still waking up between 2-8x a night to nurse. He wakes up briefly, very briefly, but it wakes me up. Sometimes I know he’s hungry when I put him to bed, but he refuses to eat knowing he’s going to nurse all night. Fine with a baby, but I’m having a hard time dealing with my 2 year old still doing it. There’s also the factor of dh not being able to sleep with us because D is up so much. We want D in his own bed, but I end up spending most of the night in there with him because he’s constantly nursing. I think he will sleep through the night when there are no more milkies to be had. Moving him into his own bed will be another issue, but easier to tackle that when there isn’t “incentive” to remain in mom’s bed.
I am sadder than I thought possible over the thought of losing this incredible, special bond with my son. I fought to breastfeed him and here I am voluntarily stopping it. It’s for the best, but I will miss it.
